ABIGAIL ADAMS "REMEMBERS THE LADIES" IN A LETTER TO HUSBAND JOHN ADAMS
I long to hear that you have declared an independency~~~and by the way in the new Code of Laws which I suppose it will be necessary for you to make, I desire you would Remember the Ladies, and you're more generous and favorable to them than your ancestors. Do not put such unlimited power into the hands of the Husbands. Remember all Men would be tyrants if they could. If particular care and attention is not paid to the Ladies, we are determined to foment a Rebellion, and will not hold ourselves bound by any Laws in which we have no voice, or Representation. That your Sex are Naturally Tyrannical is a Truth so thoroughly established as to admit of no dispute, but such of you as wish to be happy willingly give up the harsh title of Master for the more tender and endearing one of Friend.
Abigail Adams (1744-1818)
from a letter to her husband John Adam 2nd President of the United States
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Monday, January 9, 2012
EPIPHANY
We have all had that feeling that quiets us for a moment. Some ordinary experience has changed our reality slightly. An epiphany is described by the dictionary as "a sudden intuitive perception of, or insight into the reality or essential meaning of something usually initiated by some simple or commonplace occurrence or experience."
The great difference in this extraordinary learning experience is that it is experienced with ease as opposed to the experience of working to learn something. And it is never forgotten as it is an experience of the being, of the heart and mind. It ads to the experience of wholeness, oneness and dimension of our subjective human experience and translates the experience into an objective reality.
The experience does not have to make the transition immediately. It has been my experience that on more than one single occasion, the experience is remembered and will trigger an epiphany days, months or even years later. I once attended a seminar where there was something being presented that I wanted to believe in about a product that would allow me financial freedom. At the time, I felt fairly out of my element and uncomfortable, but found myself going along with all of it in an enthusiastic manner. We in attendance were all in awe of those speaking who claimed success with the product. The behavior of most of those around me seemed as wooden as my own, but I stuffed the feeling into the closet of my mind and told myself to be positive and open, buying into the seminar's focus that if I was not successful in the business that it was my choice; the feeling that they were right and I was wrong. A dinner followed the seminar and I allowed myself to feel out of place and began to attract people who seemed skeptical. Negative thinking? I got involved with the business with reluctance and it proved to be what my instincts were tugging at me to realize. The company eventually collapsed and I lost my money. For many months I felt stupid and taken. But this was a lesson, not an epiphany and I realized that it was a lesson I had to learn and it would have come in to me one way or another...and it was expensive.
The epiphany came a couple of years later. I remembered talking to a women in the seminar who seemed to be following my reactions to the speakers. I could feel her taking her cues from me with applause and my fake enthusiasm. I realized how my projection of confidence had fooled her as the speakers had fooled me. It was all a dynamic of how the idea of creating your own reality can be corrupted with false premise. It had nothing to do with loss of investment, but letting others build your dream for you. While we all have mentors and those we look up to, this experience suddenly cracked open a new reality for me. And it was just from a memory that I reinterpreted and was triggered suddenly and unexpectedly. I had been cruising for a bruising so to speak and this large investment that I made was the cost of my final lesson. The epiphany was that I realized that the lesson was clear and learned and contributed to a deeper acceptance and growth spurt in my confidence and self knowledge.
On another occasion, I was simply returning home after a disappointing day at my work. My head was down as I headed to the mail box. A younger man came into the area and his eyes lit up when he saw me. He had seen an ad for the apartment for rent and was very excited to speak to the manager. He had been looking for a place on the west side of Los Angeles or Santa Monica and this was a great building in his price range. Instantaneously my epiphany came. Here I was with the freedom I had longed for for so long with work I enjoyed, a great apartment with a view and a sense of gratitude and accomplishment. Why was I doubting myself when progress and achievement were a big part of my life. Not the success that others could recognize, but personal contentment with choices and decisions. That was enough to again transform permanently and mysteriously a code in my DNA that redefined my sense of self.
The meaning of epiphany I must slightly changed from the dictionary definition because of experience. It must include self-knowledge with that relationship to reality that is beyond the self. It is Grace that is the vehicle and the gift that arrives just at the right time and the ever so slight generosity of the self that allows it to be received
.
The great difference in this extraordinary learning experience is that it is experienced with ease as opposed to the experience of working to learn something. And it is never forgotten as it is an experience of the being, of the heart and mind. It ads to the experience of wholeness, oneness and dimension of our subjective human experience and translates the experience into an objective reality.
The experience does not have to make the transition immediately. It has been my experience that on more than one single occasion, the experience is remembered and will trigger an epiphany days, months or even years later. I once attended a seminar where there was something being presented that I wanted to believe in about a product that would allow me financial freedom. At the time, I felt fairly out of my element and uncomfortable, but found myself going along with all of it in an enthusiastic manner. We in attendance were all in awe of those speaking who claimed success with the product. The behavior of most of those around me seemed as wooden as my own, but I stuffed the feeling into the closet of my mind and told myself to be positive and open, buying into the seminar's focus that if I was not successful in the business that it was my choice; the feeling that they were right and I was wrong. A dinner followed the seminar and I allowed myself to feel out of place and began to attract people who seemed skeptical. Negative thinking? I got involved with the business with reluctance and it proved to be what my instincts were tugging at me to realize. The company eventually collapsed and I lost my money. For many months I felt stupid and taken. But this was a lesson, not an epiphany and I realized that it was a lesson I had to learn and it would have come in to me one way or another...and it was expensive.
The epiphany came a couple of years later. I remembered talking to a women in the seminar who seemed to be following my reactions to the speakers. I could feel her taking her cues from me with applause and my fake enthusiasm. I realized how my projection of confidence had fooled her as the speakers had fooled me. It was all a dynamic of how the idea of creating your own reality can be corrupted with false premise. It had nothing to do with loss of investment, but letting others build your dream for you. While we all have mentors and those we look up to, this experience suddenly cracked open a new reality for me. And it was just from a memory that I reinterpreted and was triggered suddenly and unexpectedly. I had been cruising for a bruising so to speak and this large investment that I made was the cost of my final lesson. The epiphany was that I realized that the lesson was clear and learned and contributed to a deeper acceptance and growth spurt in my confidence and self knowledge.
On another occasion, I was simply returning home after a disappointing day at my work. My head was down as I headed to the mail box. A younger man came into the area and his eyes lit up when he saw me. He had seen an ad for the apartment for rent and was very excited to speak to the manager. He had been looking for a place on the west side of Los Angeles or Santa Monica and this was a great building in his price range. Instantaneously my epiphany came. Here I was with the freedom I had longed for for so long with work I enjoyed, a great apartment with a view and a sense of gratitude and accomplishment. Why was I doubting myself when progress and achievement were a big part of my life. Not the success that others could recognize, but personal contentment with choices and decisions. That was enough to again transform permanently and mysteriously a code in my DNA that redefined my sense of self.
The meaning of epiphany I must slightly changed from the dictionary definition because of experience. It must include self-knowledge with that relationship to reality that is beyond the self. It is Grace that is the vehicle and the gift that arrives just at the right time and the ever so slight generosity of the self that allows it to be received
.
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